My happiness is very much defined not by others, but how I see the world within my thinking patterns ๐ฑ
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Let me give you an example:
After one of my classes, one of my students comes over to me and says โyou know, your classes are not my favorite because they are too easy for meโ
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Now I can interpret this in at least 3 ways:
I'm not a very good teacher – and experience shame
This person is a rude and is not communicating well – and experience anger
Or this person HAS A NEED that WASNโt MET – and experience compassion towards this person
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As Marshal Rosenberg says โwe were born as people, not CHAIRSโ. People have needs. In fact, ALL PEOPLE HAVE NEEDS. And taking care of our needs is our first responsibility in order to be a happy functioning individual. And our needs are not a reason for shame, but the beauty of what makes us a human being ๐ฅ
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๐ฏIn acroyoga, this can be applied as wellโฆ.
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In the beginning, when I was training intensely, I would be very HARD on myself. When I wouldn't perform as I would like, I would tell myself thoughts that I'm not good enough, or the skills are not done well. The focus on the outcome was a source of pain for me. It would make me feel stress, shame, and other not such fun feelings.
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Over the last year or so, i've made steps towards reframing those thoughts as needs:
โI have a need for the skill to be done in a way that uses good technique including as little steps as possible, and tempo over strengthโ
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My focus shifts towards taking care of myself, instead of judging myself. And this reframing motivates and empowers me by showing compassion towards my important needs, instead of using harsh judgement towards my actions.
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Iโm curious to know how you speak to yourself in acro. Iโd love to hear in the comments how an acro training looks like in your head…Thanks for reading!! ๐